Do brothers usually kiss their sisters?
He cummed in my mouth, then said he had to go because his best friend broke his foot falling off of a balcony, put twenty dollars in my hand and was gone before I could even swallow...
My penis hasn't been this frustrated since I was like 13 and I awkwardly got boners at school dances
the first sign of life we got from you was four hours later. you smiled without opening your eyes when tom whispered in your ear we were getting buffalo wings.
Should we discuss the rug burns on my back or just save that for a separate conversation
one of them held the wheel while the other one changed her pants. while driving. on the thruway. what
Don't worry we will all be making bad decisions soon
That's the most comforting thing I've heard in months
there is nothing more depressing than your birth control alarm going off while you're masturbating, and realizing you've been taking pointless precautions for over a month now.
Just to warn you I probably wont be able to do anything that involves standing up
ALWAYS CAPS LOCK. IS THERE EVER A SITUATION THAT DOES NOT CALL FOR CAPS LOCK? NO.
Sexting? Sexting in caps lock seems rather unnerving.
I WANT YOUR BODY AND I WANT IT NOW.
I rest my case.
Do you remember trying to make pizzas with the domino workers last night...while trying to speak their language with them.. spanish?
He found his first fuckbuddy I'm so proud I feel like making him a card or something
She drunkenly dropped her ranch for her pizza. She tried to clean it up with her hands off the street then realized it didn't work and started licking her fingers.
No, I'm just drunk and was excited cause a hot stranger bought me tacos.
He called his dick the "gentle giant"
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