so he came on my face and then proceeded to say "that was just how i imagined it would happen"
where do you find these guys?
What wine goes with Cap'n Crunch?
She's coming to town, taking me to a Suns Game, wants Anal, and knows we're not going to date, I imagine this is what heaven is like
I never once brought up his unibrow when he was insulting me. That's class.
just had to make the 420 edibles gluten free and kosher for passover.
It's great when the cashier at the liquor store asks "weren't you wearing those clothes yesterday"
Everybody in the immediate area is hooking up like it's doomsday
WHY AM I NOT THERE?
We have six bottles of wine and we are at target buying baby oil to grease up the sleds with, just in case you're interested.
Ughhh I can't remember the last time "time fell back or springed forward" and I wasn't at the bar to argue about it :(
Who says no to sex and donuts?!
Go have sex with him right now! Drunk sex is the best sex.
I know but these gold fish are so much better
They tricked me into going into that room by saying we'd smoke a bowl and then they all proceeded to have an intervention with me about my love life.
i cant hook up i'm covered in egg rolls
It's like his penis moved in and did some interior decorating without telling me first...
Fucking hate kids. In particular I hate our kids.
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