***** fucked a guy with one hand last night
We are brilliant. We call it the pint walk. Killing a pint of vodka while we walk from cleveland park to dupont. just making mama proud
She told me that she had to rub her face against me because she was part cat.
So what if i'm late to spanish tomorrow. who the hell cares. i don't even speak spanish.
ok please explain why some one shaved half of my pubes?
I smoked weed with pregnant girl. I'm going to hell.
I'm still not walking right. We need some boundaries for "drink-or-dare"...
Law school has no idea what kind of prospect they have coming in. I just convinced a cop not to take me to jail by asking him if he really felt like cleaning puke out of his car tonight.
I just threw up in my front yard because my roommate was in the bathroom. Fuck New Years Day.
Is 1:30 too early for the bar?
Do you want my opinion or society's?
I want your company
the only thing I remember was some guy took out his fake eye to use it for beer pong
I couldn't read the menu. I ordered the first thing I was able to read. Don't think I ate anything. Left $20 on the table.
Your clever response has earned you a blow job this week
How do I say "I want to suck your balls" in a classy but sexy way,
my friends roomated asked me this morning if we went to mcdonalds last night and i had no idea...that is until i checked my purse and found half a mcdouble in it...
Randomize
