Tip #47, don't trim the bush when you have the shakes!
I just saw a girl in Albersons in spandex and curlers buying PBR. Only PBR.
I mean I found and stalk his moms facebook.. that obsessed.
It' a whole new level of walk of shame. I'm carrying his sheets since I have a washer/dryer.
He just came into the room wearing nothing but a Speed Racer helmet. I think he just invented a fetish.
the point of no return was when you "drugged" his drink with glitter. face-planting on his dick was beyond.
I'm just concerned it's gonna end up in my vagina again
My vagina supports interfraternal relations
Ugh. This is the type of hangover that all other hangovers want to grow up to be.
YOU LET ME GO HOME WITH CREEPY RON JEREMY?!?
...and?
I hate when you're right.
after you left he started opening his bottles by smashing the neck against the edge of the fireplace and pouring beer into his mouth. it was about the manliest thing ive ever seen. its probably how lumberjacks open their beers... if they didnt have their axes handy.
She was chasing her shots with beefaroni and I think I fell in love.
So I think my motto should be "losing bras and dignity every weekend" but like in a really amazing way
Sorry, i'm on a strict diet of vodka and regret
The lady in the stall next to me just screamed "why are you so hairy!?" and "why can't you get any!?" to her vagina. WTF
Randomize
