so then she threw up in his asshole
yep..that'll do it.
The make-up sex just reminded me why we broke up in the first place.
In retrospect, getting to second base BEFORE anal wouldve been a good idea
it never fails, everytime he manages to fuck my earrings out of my ears.
I just realized I'm not towing a trailer. I thought this whole drive home I was towing a trailer. Wow too high
Housing is going to charge us for any broken dishes/glassware. Steal as many glasses as you can from the bars tonight. I got the baking dish and 3 plates covered.
"Every minute you spend hanging out with David is a minute you could spend meeting someone new, who isn't a huge douche" - Buddha
I think I'm too tall to 69 successfully.
I think I might cry.
I hope you gays don't get too crazy after DOMA. Gay divorces aren't any better than straight ones.
I think the "tmi" ship sailed a long time ago, and it took our dignities with it..
If they could bottle a hangover it would taste exactly like lemon lime Gatorade and failed hopes and dreams
See, I'm just thinking of how...angular my room is. You probably would have sustained brain damage
I put a bagel at the end of my bed so every time I want a bite I have to do a sit up
I just spent 3 hours in the back of an unmarked police cruiser. Best. Date. Ever.
WHAT THE FUCK I JUST PULLED TWO TAMPONS OUT OF MY VAGINA. WHERE DID THE OTHER ONE COME FROM??
....surprise!
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