you can still come hang out if you want
I really don't feel like watching you play video games
She looks like Robin Williams dressed as a frog.
I don't remember her name, but I do remember yelling at her from the balcony of the hotel room during her walk of shame.
i have some very unhappy turtles in my backseat
I come up with the best drinking games while babysitting
I'm spooning a three legged dog right now. Started drinking whiskey with Breakfast. Best part about being biracial is Irish cousins. Dog Pic Attahed
I hate about 85% of people that I meet. I'm an awful person. In reality my only redeeming qualities are my face, my amazing scissoring skills and the fact that children love me.
True on all accounts.
Is percocet and coffee considered a balanced breakfast?
I will give you all my nachos to make this happen
Do I need to take a photo of my sister's enlarged and disgustingly dark nipples to scare you into protection? DO I?
tell me why they applauded then the bartender locked himself in the bathroom when i walked into the bar today ????
Naw, the sex dungeon had to come down so we could build a nursery. Cause and effect really.
Who says no to sex and donuts?!
Apparently the guy with the moaning gf that lives above us is in my DES class... AWKWARD
You really need to stop getting injured so often it's really starting to negatively impact my sex life. Oh and get well soon. . . no seriously though hurry the fuck up.
Randomize
