There's a girl here with sideburns. I gave her your number, you can thank me later.
is it wrong to smoke out middle schoolers?
yes...dear jesus what did you do?
bwahaha. ask your little brother in about 20 minutes. im dropping him off.
nothing makes up for a small, perpetually flaccid penis quite like a British accent
I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! Live in the flesh!
I just cleaned your Jaeger vomit off my car with a knife. Don't ever say I don't love you.
Maybe just the first 2 wks of Nov can be dick detox.
I don't really want to have sex with him, I'd just want him in a threesome. Does that make sense?
I will be single by the day my lease is up (234 days). Plan accordingly.
it's too much effort for something that isn't food.
do you ever look at a card in your wallet and reminisce about all of the drugs youve done with it?
Some how my underwear was hanging from the antlers of a antelope head on the wall of the hotel........
Im gnna go loik fir my newq gay friuend now
Goodbee
ya I had reallllllly good sex last night too that will probably get me evicted
I'm glad you found someone that both loves you and is cool doing coke off your tits. Proud of you.
Update: drank half a bottle of Bourbon and texted three ex's. Waiting for the roommates to go to sleep so I can raid the fridge.
Randomize
