Her best guy friend really had a thing for her all along.... Now we're back together and he's gone Dawson's Creek with his away messages.
I'm making a contract of things you're not allowed to put in my ass
I'm doing lines by myself in the kitchen. I think your outside. yeah that's you. your naked.
I'm hiding out in the living room until he falls back asleep. If he catches a whiff of my tits, it's all over. I just need to play it cool. Babies can smell fear
somedays, I wish the drugs you give me would convince me they were a bad idea preingestion.
where's the fun in that?
I just wanna lay in my bed all bundled up as have someone feed me lettuce
Just showered now I smell like berries instead of shame
Every time I think about it I can feel His toe in my mouth and I gag, I'm scarred for life.
he tried to give me his business card but gave me his health insurance card then realized it and offered to take me to the strip club
"willing to pay anyone fun whos willing to hang out and laugh at my jokes while my friends are MIA" is this to desperate?
Matt's offering to breast feed it.
I need vitamin water and Jesus :/
The last thing I remember is goading each other into a vodka-chugging competition.
Yeah, I'm sure we have time for sex AND ihop.
Doug the spinning teacher gave me chlyamdia
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