Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
how did your night go?
he asked for my myspace name.
this episode of spongebob makes me wish crabby patties were real
he went down on me with a nose plug on, you tell me how it went
he's drinking beer at home in his underwear tonight and if you want to come over the dresscode is underwear only. And you have to bring beer.
I'm doing homework tonight but if you end up going out drinking I would like one courtesy peer pressure text.
My pants are like a grocery bag containing ONLY jelly beans right now.
Not gonna lie, Wednesday was the perfect day to get laid off, all I've done since is watch the Simpsons marathon
Day two of not drinking, I think my cat is trying to eat me.
Psychosis secondary to sobriety???
If catching your vomit in my hands while swimming in a bath tub full of it doesn't make us best friends, I don't know what will
I described my life as a 7 layer cake of death
I just feel like if we dated, he'd just be crying the entire relationship
Cover your peen. We're going out.
We peed on a building I think...like a building in downtown...not out of view of anyone.
Straight up just cock blocked my dad. Also this apple sauce is good.
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