i jhust puked up my retainher.
So I'm sober and underage, being hit on by a groom-to-be with braces...is it a bad thing that I'm enjoying it?
apparently when i got back to tyler's i layed face down on the bed and yelled "don't hurt my asshole!"
omg a stripper jus od'd on stage.
next time the cops show up in riot gear we should probably leave
and miss being on the news....no way
Just wandered into a surprise final. Only a surprise for me though. I wish I could say this is the first time this has happened.
Well apparently "don't come inside of me" wasn't one of the English phrases he understood! On the bright side... At least he will get his green card for having an american kid!
We left the bar, went to a sex shop, bought penis shotglasses, went back to the bar and insisted that the bartender used them.
I promised myself in the hospital that I would give up drinking for however long the cast stayed on. Thank god it was only soft tissue and not a fracture.
He literally cocked blocked all the dudes that tried to talk to the girls he was with, and they all loved him.
Same guy who tossed the brunet over his shoulder as they left screaming "Bring me my lucky shovel!"
I yelled kanye while he was fucking me. It just felt right
It took me three days, but I managed to nearly get arrested on my way out of LA. Made it to the airport. Crisis averted, though. The real crime is, my flight is delayed two hours.
It would be weird sobbing cry sex.
Dude, you fell into a tree, and both of the tables, AND the window well... Resilient aren't you?
my mom is feeding me weed brownies...god help us
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