I have a pussy blister if you wanna poke at it with a needle tomorrow...by this text i realize just how strange our relationship is, especially because you're probably excited
I think you mean your blister is filled with pus...atleast i hope
I knew the sex would be bad when he slipped the rubber on and said "safe sex activated"
proof that my night is going well: I can still open doors
of course not. I do my best teaching on a hungover monday. I did the research. im still okay with the direction in which my life is headed.
My neighbor Chris is here. I am warning you, he is wearing a kilt I just saw his balls. Be incredibly careful that you don't see what I did.
Hey, the point is, I have 3 guys to fuck to get over the last one. It's my golden rule. You told me to find a hobby! It translated as "find another guy".
That is the opposite way I told you to find a hobby.
I don't remember what you were saying to me in the bathroom. But whatever it was, yes, because i remember nodding a lot.
I'm not drinking with you for AT LEAST a day
You don't know scared until you've just begun the first stage of an acid trip till a guy on stilts with a creepy mustache and beard says "enter the Forrest"
Did you get any pics? And I can only imagine how inferior you must have felt knowing that somewhere in that room was a guy whose penis was the length of your forearm.
Did you survive the Atlanta roadway snowpocalypse?
All the bars are closed. Might as well be dead.
He went to cum on my stomach and somehow it got behind my ear. He's like a fucking jizz Houdini.
I know I say this every year but 2015 will be the year I finally have sex with David's sister
I woke up in a bush somewhere in Tucson with a full suit on. Great way to end my birthday.
did i get sucker punched in the face last night or was our make-out session just that intense?
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