Fantastic night. drank beer from a wine bottle, danced on a van, chased a llama, and fell from a fence
Take one last look at my face, because I'm drinking it off tonight.
I'm high, and her 2,100 tagged pictures annoy me even MORE. I wish it had a google searchbar so I could type in "cleavage pics" to get to the point.
The visine ive been using for four yrs expired. in sept. of 2001.....i will never question my eye problems again.
thank you for introducing me to everyone on chat roulette as I was passed out.
The trip involved octopus tentacles coming from the little holes in my TV's speakers. The beauty of the nonexistant symbolism had me in tears.
You are COMPLAINING that the sex was too good. You're not getting any sympathy from me
I think the saddest part about my sex life is that most of it is pity sex.
Me too, I feel like I pinched your nipples excessively. At the time it seemed like a good idea, but in retrospect I'm not so sure.
I'm eating shredded cheese and chugging coke, until I can function again. I'm tingling everywhere
Fuck you guys, I'm trying to nurse my hangover and eat my chicken tenders in peace.
You don't get to call me bro after you've had your dick in me.
You said the best orgasm you ever had, you gave to yourself. your boyfriend looked really disappointed. so did half the room.
I snuck a teenager into a club last nite, I felt like such a criminal. It was Awsome
I may have been bent over an elementary school lunch table a few weeks ago. Don't judge.
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