Nob stitches i do do not bleed anymorr!
White boys cant dance....we did an empirical study
this girl ate taco bell on my bed naked last night, it was the sexiest thing ive ever seen
How come ATM is perfectly acceptable, yet not washing your hands after you poo is socially reprehensible?
it's like god just wants me to be high for five days in a row. keep the blizzards coming.
He kept moaning America instead of Erica while fucking me.
what whaaaat?! I BET YOU WIN IN THE TEETH DEPARTMENT.
Im on my period and I feel like I'm going to die. The only thing that can make this tolerable is for you to eat me out in the shower. Please. I'll do anything.
Putting a positive pregnancy test next to my condoms in my drawer so I remember why I always need to use condoms
You just want to live out all your fuck fantasies with all these girls through me. I know your game. Well played sir.
Only time and a comprehensive case study of all of your relationships will tell.
Why is there never any toilet paper at his apartment? What does he wipe his ass with? WHAT DOES HE WIPE IT WITH?!?
I accidently sent a dick pic to the group chat with her family. Right after they all said it was a pleasure having me for dinner. Wana drink with me?
Oh god theyre drunkenly throwing knifes now, definitely the best movie I've worked on
Dont... please don't. Don't fuck him on his bean bag bed
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