Just soaked up some whiskey with a paper towel and then squeezed it into a cup for consumption. New low.
so looking at the guys i've dated i feel my vag is a halfway house
Found out that it IS actually possible to get road head from somebody in the back seat
not sure how we got back down, broken rib says we didn't use stairs
I'm going to die alone in a sea of empty vodka bottles and cats.
It wasn't a threesome, it was me making out with one while looking at the other one screaming "does this make you jealous?"
Gonna send a picture of my negative pregnancy test with the message "Merry Christmas" to the guys I've been sleeping with. That alone, will put a huge dent in my shopping list of gifts for people.
I think we need to teach you what straight means again
You're too morally constrained. I firmly believe that you should be less concerned with how young she is and more excited by the fact that she's not jailbait by virtue of a legal technicality.
There was a group of girls next to us. One was smiling at me. I only remember walking up and saying "oh you're Russian". Not sure where it went from there
It was going alright when lo and behold Tom the cock blocking tornado hits. He is the only man I know who doesn't want anyone to fuck girls.
I did the walk of shame this morning and his mom hugged me in the driveway
Random one night stand with a guy that had a USA tattoo on his ass. Can't possibly get more American than that
I almost rear ended this hot guy driving a Porsche Cayenne just so I could get his phone number
just hooked up with a guy ON MY CAMPUS VISIT. god only knows whats gonna happen when im actually a student
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