You told him your wedding ring was part of your costume. not okay!!
anyone who has a picture of a ferrari with the caption "mAh DreAM caR" is getting denied as my facebook friend.
Someone in my history class just FB messaged me saying they highly suggest I put my sunglasses on. He is sitting 18 rows in front of me...
It's never good when you wake up covered with burns
She talked about nothing but beanie babies for 45 minutes. I'm never getting high with her again.
BEER BONG IN THE STOCKROOM COME IN TO WORK TODAY
Gravity stopped and i'm discussing Greek philosophy with two guys I don't know. There's someone asleep on me. We need to use their dealer.
You had the genius idea to tape beer to the celing fan. There goes his security deposit. He is gonna be fuckin pissed.
So hungover. Walked into room and poached their catering before realized in wrong place. Scowled and ate it anyway
Soggy bong water carpet is the worst kind of carpet.
I feel like it went downhill once I decided we should take $100 tequila shots.. oops lol
It's called hot rabbit the party if he asks the password is "careful" don't ask
I honestly didn't think living in Canada would change me, until I found myself watching hockey porn
He doesn't have much of a personality but he makes up for it with his sexual prowess
keeper.
She was talking about how a garden gnome was hitting on her the whole night. We thought she was just that high, but turned out the gnome was that guy in the weird hat.
Randomize