4:12a: just got back to his place now. I don't want to talk about it
he just texted me two pictures of his dick. i feel i should rethink whatever vibe im obviously giving out
so is it as big as he says?
he put a tube of toothpaste next to it as a reference. it looks legit
Ive had to apologize to every girl i know today because of you
Apparently i just threw up in the bathroom, i told them i just blew my nose. i don't think they believe me...
There is no way I'm taking advice from somone who's idea of a balanced diet consists of vodka and lemon detox juice
I made him go down on me for 40 mins then pretended to pass out. I swear, I'm like a boy.
In all seriousness, if tomorrow night becomes a heated game of Which Ex Gets To Take The Plastered Birthday Girl Home, I'm going to bow out with my integrity intact.
Id have to say flaming beer pong was a royal success.
Bro my mom is in for two days and you can't even hold back on the drinking she said as she left i hope he doesn't always pee his pants and he is sure popular with the girls wtf
Hello. You don't know me, but word on the street is that we are now eskimo sisters. I feel like we should go out for coffee and compare experiences.
Might I also add after my boss threw up in the garbage can and yelled puking rally, he dougied, then told me I wasn't about that life.
I'm not drinking with you for AT LEAST a day
You don't know how emotionally damaged I am from crashing into that park maintenance van. I'll never ride a bike because of it.
You put me in such a good mood with that road head, I bought everyone at Hooters donuts.
I just tried to dye my pubic hair teal for her
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