Prostitute standing on the corner thrusting at cars as they drive by. New marketing strategy?
So guess who had sex in a Ghostbusters sleeping bag.
Im doing kagels to the beat of Christmas music... "Jingle Bells" is hard. Try it.
Just ordered a clown who does balloon animals. No backing out now.
this islike a room full of reasons why i should be in prison
I made him sleep with a condom on and i passed out on the carpet with only a bra on.
I gave up trying to understand them years ago. Now I'm just trying to fuck them.
Having the sex-a-thon in the back yard led to some really odd tan lines.
Like handprints on my lower back...
Whatever, consider condoms an eighteen year investment.
I could probably save all of the money I would have spent on condoms and put a kid through college.
Just burnt my nuts with a cigarette. Don't ask. I hate life.
Everytime Our professor said "penis fencing" in class today we took shots.
You were talking to yourself and eating cold cuts in the kitchen when I found you
Went to take a shower. Brought my wine, forgot my towel.
So if I run into you on the street, I'm supposed to just stop drop and suck your dick?
My Boss was giving porn recommendations. I think I'm scarred for life.
Randomize
