she just put all the cheese in the refrig to sleep.. and yes we did finish you bottle.
Her life must suck. All she's got is "Miss Shamrock" WHICH SHE LOST!
this text is just filler to avoid a lull in the conversation
i wish there was a photo editing effect that fully opened my drunk eyes
Ive been sitting around naked watching magic on youtube.
The frequency that you give me blue balls couldn't be healthy.
we did shots in class this morning as part of a presentation. WHY AM I LEAVING THIS COUNTRY?!
I guess I made wings because there's chicken everywhere. Even on the walls. 3 of them. It's like a chicken grave yard.
The trashcan full of everclear punch caught on fire...you should probably come home now.
I just saw a fat girl roll down the steps taking out three people with her, thought you should know.....
The doctor that gave me my std test is trying to hook me up with her daughter lol
I probably should have eaten more before I started shotgunning beers at 9am, but it was so much damn fun.
I'm stoned as hell watching the new Star Trek movie. My life is 110% better than it was an hour ago.
I don't think I'm ever gonna need a boyfriend again. I have a body pillow, a vibrator, and I'm strong enough to open my own jars.
After he came, he took a two minute power nap and then fucked me for another 45 minutes. He is a machine!
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