I think I just saw someone hide a body.
and when i put it inside her she yelled "welcome aboard!"
I just saw Ann slam dunk her puke bag into a trash can on Avenue A. You ladies might want to consider putting the Patron shots down and going home.
your transformation into a slut upon entering college is like a shakespearian tragedy
Anything that's based on a blow job I'm in favor of.
dude. how can brian from family drink at fucking bars? he's a dog and definitaly doesn't have pockets.
He kept saying 'your mouth is Amazing' even after I was on his dick.
If you're trying to piece together your night, I can tell you where those tassels came from.
I just kept pointing at random people and telling the bartender to put it on their tab.
I have discovered my latent superpower. If a friend is dating a bi chick they will inevitably try and talk me into a threesome.
Come to find out, there is a place where binge drinking and aggressive head butting is completely appropriate. In a mosh pit, Travis is just a regular dude!
Somewhere out there, on several phones belonging to strangers, exists a video of me rapping Baby Got Back on stage in four inch heels that I stole from the drag queen. Also I made out with the chick with the octopus tattoo.
You have the best birthdays
Topless Tuesday? One of us will be really happy the other not so much.
I just moved my 11am hair appointment to 8am so I could blackout at noon. Who am I?
Played Gay Bar on the jukebox and pissed off the Republicans here. Best day before birthday ever.
Randomize
