i didnt like the question options for my yahoo account..so i made up the question and it was "favorite bathroom to shit in"
i dont know you, but i just did a line with your business card.
just rolled a joint with wrapping paper.. and you say i have no christmas spirit
My cardio has turned into running out of the cold from bar to bar.
the girl i fucked last night woke up this morning, disoriented and looked at me, and said "oh, you're hot." and went back to sleep.
Is it sad that when she told me he has a small peen I felt like it made us more compatible?
There's a girl at 7-11 apologizing for her behavior and asking if she can get her shoes back.
I made him recite stats from the playoffs game last night before I would go down on him.
I looked the guy across the room straight in the eyes and said, "If you were any closer to me, we'd be making out right now."
i'm totally cool with all the dick sucking you're doing down there, but as your brother i think i'm supposed to warn you our parents will be home in 5
I don't even fuck like that, he just happened to be in the right place at the right drunk.
she basically told me that her vine videos last longer that I do
I'm gone to the point of literally hugging trees, partially for support, but also because I like them.
Screaming "dámelo" at the bottle of scotch was definitely my best and worst moment of Cinco de Mayo 2015.
Did my dad just see you doing a walk of shame?
Yup I waved.
Randomize
