just woke up. wallet empty. bottle empty. tattoo in pen on my arm. smell like bad sex. woke up alone. and wall-e is playing on my computer. need answers.
i don't remember her name, but i don't need it unless we decide to hook up again. but even then, i can get away with not knowing it for a while. it's not like we have actual conversations.
Soooo billy mays was on coke. I'm about as shocked as I was when Clay Aiken came out
it's not gay if you rub your penis between their butt cheeks and pretend they are tits
just throwing this out there: period starts tomorrow sooo either sex tonight or not until tues/weds.
i get a bj anyways so it's really your choice.
k i'll be over in 5.
he left me a 6 minute video of him peeling a clementine listening to justin bieber
i actually have a tan line from him holding my boob while we were sunbathing
We had to leave the bar because you were trying to show the bartender your boobs for water.
A kid in my class brought a George Foreman and cooked food mid lecture. When the prof found out, all the kid did was ask if he wanted some.
I think there was chlamydia in those woods.
Worst part of blacking out... Waking up and having to do the teeth check
At Walgreens. I'm getting condoms and a bottle of water so that I'm not "just getting condoms". I don't think I'm fooling anyone though.
I'm ordering dildos in a santa hat. You?
I feel like my foot is being amputated. Or maybe it's the vodka. I couldn't tell you.
I vaguely remember ordering a water at some point last night. It's good to know drunk me can still be responsible.
Randomize