So I just watched the Lakers/Magic game so I could have something to talk about with him after we have sex this time
You came back with puke all over your sweatshirt and started doing darth vader impressions
If I banged a coworker last night but didn't enjoy it can I put it down on my timesheet?
I'll put it this way. My grandkids felt that fuck.
On the couch having a debate with the dog over whether eating anothr sweet roll will make the hangover better or worse
She is singing the swedish chef song and throwing utensils. I love this place
would it be completely unacceptable to smoke a cig outside naked? im already doing it so what you say doesn't matter.
I feel like despite his sleaziness I could be friends with this man. he just sent me a picture of his dog's balls.
Probably twitter. Never underestimate a psycho girl with wifi
IF WE WERE REALLY BEST FRIENDS FOREVER YOU GUYS WOULD AGREE TO A WATCHING A PORNO PARTY
Roomie questionaires don't ask any of the important questions like "how do you feel about one night stands" and "will you judge me post-walk of shame"
I feel so bad for your roommate
Honestly I was sitting in managerial accounting thinking "I really need to get my shit together and stop drinking so much wine." But when you asked I realized... it's wine. It's always a yes.
My dad slapped my ass the other day and say I was "doing the family name good". I feel...proud
Holy shit I'm 26! That took an embarrassingly long time to figure it out, I need to keep buyin weed from this kid
Now with the essential back story, I can empathize. Sorry about your beer and butthole.
Randomize
