Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(912): View more from Georgia

That's intense

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(678): View more from Georgia

apparently farting at a cop is considered assault.

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(512): View more from Texas

my dad just secretly slid me a nugg in front of my mom. remind me why I moved away for college??

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(805): View more from California

Eating meat and looking at porn while roommate is at church for Ash Wednesday. Win.

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(601): View more from Mississippi

Also managed to rip my pants and set myself on fire. And oddly enough I'm still not ready to ask for 2010 back.

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(519): View more from Ontario

That's fun. I just masturbated and I swear my vagina creaked.

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(912): View more from Georgia

If the world ends now I want you to know I was on my favorite toilet fighting the good fight.

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(312): View more from Illinois

Philosophical question for you: is it better to go into work slightly drunk or slightly coked out?

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(778): View more from British Columbia

We need a kiddie pool and lots of cornstarch

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