mutual masturbation is only cool if cash money records is involved.
I shaved my legs finally. I am starting to remember what my skin feels like.
Wow anytime a scalper has i need tix written on the back of a franzia box thats a trusted seller
I didnt realize til after I got out of her apartment and into the lobby that we lived in the same building.
Can I get a DUI with a shopping cart? I've nearly hit 2 displays and little girl...
Still can't believe they give people like us a drivers license and college degree.
i could have sworn she did an overextended split with her legs over her head but now i think it was just the drugs
The bartender from Thursday remembered me... And gave me a FLAMING BUCKET of alcohol.
Marshall is naming all the elements of my face. I love science nerds.
Signs of a stoner: trying everything in your fridge topped with peanut butter to seek satisfaction.
This morning he fucked me while I was brushing my teeth. So I kept brushing as he thrusted. Then I brushed his teeth with my toothbrush while he was still in me. So hygienic.
So like if I threw up in my purse is that "don't ever show your face in public again" worthy or just slightly frowned upon
Are there rules against fucking your ex's dealer?
you were trying to drink the laundry detergent and yelling blue drankkkkk
What should I list for life skills
How about home wrecking? You’re excellent at that
Hmm...that is a life skill in Southern California
Randomize
