do you remember what downloading porn with a 14k modem was like?
apparently i broke a 100 dollar bill to tip the bartender on a free drink
Jon and Kate are totally playing with my emotions.
i mean i care more about their marriage then my own parents
Please explain to me why I only attract Mormon guys. Just explain that to me.
I think it's God trying to counter your lustful nature. Imagine if Agnostics liked you. You'd never come out of your bedroom.
worst night to have a conscience
on of the only things i remember was the security guard told me i was too drunk for laser tag.
I made out with the bride. You tell me how my night was
Do 'mystery' cracked ribs heal any quicker than regular ones?
oh my god i'm in a crawl space
I was rolling balls and tried to donate blood as an act of kindness to the sick person who would receive it
I threw up in a mitten on my drive home. Wow.
Dude a gay guy just Sparta kicked this Samoan guy for calling him a flamer you need to get down here the free kamakazee shots haven't even started yet
I'm not gonna lie. The thing I miss the most about him right now is the air conditioned hotel rooms.
I am stoned at Disneyland with my little brother. It's gonna be a good day.
I usually do that but weve been going unprotected with tribal fertility symbols painted above my door
Randomize
