Best news ive heard all week. The cougars r coming! The cougars are coming!
just threw up into the cup of Gatorade I was hoping would settle my stomach. thanks again, alcohol.
You must have had one hell of a time explaining to that girl why aladin soundtrack was playing on repeat in your room when you got back
I just got kidnapped by the rugby team for a scavenger hunt. I'm "the girl you had sex with last night"
They both invited me to family dinner Sunday. Secretly dating two sisters just got real.
Definitely contact high. Thirty miles an hour listening too i can see clearly now wanting too eat the steering wheel
It was all going great until he pulled the hamburger meat out of his pocket
im destined to be single forever. i hope its okay if your kids come and hang out with my cats.
Hey hey, in my defense we were just suppose to watch Disney movies from a blanket fort with beer and nachos. I was I suppose to know it would end in tears?
I'm pretty sure I had my drunk fortune told by a gay Miss Cleo last night. At least it's advice sober me can agree with.
We bonded over the fact that we each, separately, got arrested on the same weekend.
Why did I puke in my shower caddy last night
My mom just made me promise her that i'll care about the next guy I sleep with
Now just crop his dad out and add it to the spank bank.
I just didn't expect to have anal in a retail store at 9 AM on a Tuesday.
Randomize
