i just told my boss to make it rain at camelot later...what is wrong with me?
Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
I just put a picture of what I imagine Rob's dick looks like on it on my vision board. thank you Oprah!
he broke up with me while standing outside, half naked, waiting to fuck him. i feel like a leper right about now.
i know you like preteen girls so i'm gonna offer you some advice...dump a bucket of glitter on yourself and walk into the sunlight. they will come running.
every time you want to hook up with a guy who has a girl friend, i'll just give you a freshman
I told her that if she blew me I would give her the empty pizza box in the fridge.... Why did she agree?
From now on when a guy sends me a dick picture I'm going to send them a picture of some other dudes dick.
Please just fuck her. She's new to LA and doesn't know anyone nice.
I had not one but two drunk coworkers text me and hit on me tonight. I feel like I've finally been accepted into my dysfunctional workplace
I have a LOT of reasons to worry about radical feminists taking my lady balls, frankly. A lot.
You fell out of the chair and then lifted your foot saying, "If my foot could give you the middle finger it would."
Some guy just ate one of the dog treats. I have him a free beer. I love my job.
you literally stared at me for three minutes and then said "hey this tequila isn't gonna drink itself, boss"
10 shots in she's sitting on the floor using the open dishwasher door as a plate to eat her "life giving" pizza.
Randomize
