Did you just see the Batmobile???
Vegas is awesome. Its like you have a kentucky accent girls automatically assume you don't have herpes.
I just paid a homeless man $20 for the dragon ball Z shirt he was wearing. I need to stop drinking
thanks. im glad you find me better in your comparison between me and fat girl porn.
Frozen pudding on a popsicle stick. Bill Cosby would be so proud of drunk me.
I no longer see him as a simple set of male genitalia attached to a very sexy body. The title "trophy fuck" seems wrong. Damn.
We were talking when all of a sudden she reach and started squeezing my dick and goes "nice." and then just kept the conversation going like nothing happened.
So our trip to Disney World ended in the three of us stripping at a gay club in orlando.
It's def pee. WHY DO I PEE ON THINGS WHEN I DRINK TEQUILA
This will always be remembered as the Christmas I had 15 Russians sing christmas carols to me at 130am alone in a gas station while I was stoned on pot brownies
I'm not saying I would have to be high to sleep with him. I'm just saying it would probably help.
I fucked him while wearing his hat. I love the navy
We have to do it Saturday and get a thirty. If i remember correctly it takes me 12 beers to become a wizard
That's brilliant but could get us arrested. Give me shots until I shout LET'S DO THIS
it’s my vagina i can do what i want to
Randomize
