do you know mcdonalds refuses to give out large cups of water now? you have to buy a bottle or they give you a small cup. No exceptions.
RUDE.
I said FINE, then I'd like 7 small waters and 2 of those nifty carrying cases to carry about my h2o.
outsmarted mickey deeeees
He was trying to put his hand up my shirt but I remembered the coke was stashed in my bra so I moved his hand to my pants
Omg I'm so stupid. All the peoples fb status that said "spain" I thought they were all going to spain.......
At what point in my life was I not hugged enough to be on my fourth walk of shame in half as many weeks?
The fact that he is from Canada is way more embarrassing than the fact that you met him on match.com
Did you get your crutches off the street sign?
It's not like I ment to feed you the shots of vodka, my hand just kinda slipped.
Oh man. Realized I was high when I realized how long I'd been watching Roseanne
So as I left the Australian's hotel room, I said "Welcome to America. You're going to do just fine here."
Who takes their shirt off at the bar?! Classy broad
I do. In all fairness there was someone else's blood on it.
Things are very odd on my 29th hour of being awake. Thought there was a bird in my lecture hall and it was just a girl putting up her hair. What even
she said she wouldn't go home with me until she looked up my name in her sex offender app. do i really give off that vibe?
Yeah. It's not just the beard either.
Instead of more alcohol, I decided to drink tea. Lets slow clap it out for me
It's sunday night and I just went to the store to buy cookie dough and condoms, I'm so proud of myself.
only 4 hours until nug lovin time
excuse me?
nug lovin. lovin nugs.
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