its like they have never seen someone walk through campus with a plunger
We built a fire and had sex in the kiddie pool. Then he washed my hair
Strong work
we all thought you were asleep. he found you an hour later sitting outside in the snow lighting a bowl, singing the CatDog theme song, and hugging a box a Franzia.
New rule: if you don't think racism exists, you don't get to put your penis inside me.
Do you remember whose house we're in?
sitting in a shitty karaoke bar playing pokemon go and drinking a mimosa. how is your sunday night
I made out with the uber driver for free weed, I thought he deserved it
Nothing says happy Monday quite like coffee and oral sex.
I've amended my previous statement: I'm not allowed to put in my two weeks till I ask out the waitress. Now I have motivation on two levels
Anyone who can sit 4 hours in a doobie circle with their feet in a kiddie pool is ok by me
the police dropped me off. that's how my night went.
I need to start journaling my drunk thoughts. Drunk me is fucking brilliant & sober me is missing out.
my comprehension of H.D. Thoreau really dives after 8 beers.....
It will astound me if they ever let you graduate.
So I have now fucked both my roommates...This is why I can’t live with men.
I wasn’t trying, but work got a lot easier and more fun once he starred flirting with me and looking at my ass
Randomize
