hipster in red sally jessy raphael glasses inside. kick her.
Brogan sounds similar to Bridget...sorta.
Every girl's name is automatically translated to "Baby/Milk Carrier" in my brai
So can we just skip dinner and I'll just pay you for a blowjob?
Don't tempt me, I need beer money.
so this chick screams out the name doug is bed..not to later do i find out doug is her vibrator
hello competition
My god. We'll be gay porn millionaires.
I took us ten minutes to realize the shower sex going upstairs was the reason the kitchen ceiling was flooding.
His body is just chiseled out of sex. I would let that man do anything to my body. Including fuck me while my parents watch
Just so we're clear this time around: This is dinner with my FAMILY. Not an opportunity for you to drink too much, and use the word "dick-thumpin" in casual conversation.
Guys with values who care about your personality don't cum on your back the 2nd time they you sleep with you.
Also, what is a socially acceptable way to introduce a crossbow in public?
I'm sorry for not being sorry about whatever shit I did to you when you were annoying and I was drunk. That is all.
i spent my morning giving relationship advice to the kid i had sex with on a kitchen table this weekend
I paid your brother in tostitos to drive me home.
My cast smells like cheese steak rolls
And as drunk as I was I was able to show my mom how to make text italicized in Microsoft word
Randomize
