It's what's on the inside that counts(972): They probably have big open vaginas so the inside is no good
we were both hunting dick last night. it ended terribly for both of us.
craigslist faux pas number 857, just got head in a disability bus.
i rewarded my self with tacobell for not throwing up on any one. MISTAKE
im going to live freely with my legs opened and my heart closed
we were hanging out in his room and he decided to play WoW.. so i took off all my clothes while he wasn't paying attention and laid on his bed and started playing with myself.
did he notice?
of course he didn't notice.. he was playing a fiesty level 1 fucker that wouldn't give up..
Realized I'm still to drunk to comprehend work emails. Marked them all as unread. Here's to responsible hang overs.
And they were awkwardly all over each other in a Christian way.
There is a really great story behind the missing Coco Puffs and vodka mystery
Donating $10 to Sandy victims for every hurricane I drink tomorrow. Buying me alcohol just became a good cause.
you 2 were alone in the living room and the dog walked in and you started yelling what are all these people doing in here
I told you I missed you and you said you missed me as much as you miss a urinary tract infection. I get it. You're still mad.
Last time I checked he was house sitting for his ex while she was out of town with some new dude. He was crying about how the guy told him to stay out of his whiskey while he was gone. That's whipped
It shouldn't be this hard to find someone who you haven't blown.
The only thing I remember is the 300 pound man breaking ur railing from sliding down it at 3 am. Must of been a good night.
Randomize
