Totally saw a hot amputee. I think this is called character growth.
At the Phils game. My gay buddy just wanted up to a bunch of Mets fans and said "I'm gay, and even I think Mets fans are a bunch of fags." I love this fuckin town.
The weather is perfect in Seattle right now. Warm enough for girls to not wear bras, but cold enough for me to see them nipping out in the shade.
yours is so small it looks like an acorn!!
no more everclear, i just stood next to the toilet and peed my pants. then went back to the party soaking wet.
By the way, she says hi. At least I think she did since she licked my phone
Just saw a woman with a Pomeranian in her bra. Way to step up your game Seattle.
and the award for most disgusting thing ever done on my couch now officially goes to you! Congratulations, you won the couch...I can't even look at it anymore.
hanging out with you guys is like living the wikipedia entry for drugs...not sure i can handle that tonight.
I like to keep a steady black out going for the holidays. I feel it makes me less cynical
It's amazing to think about how many Obama victory sex babies are being prevented by Obamacare free contraception.
Any recommendations for how to tell your wife about the pics of her 19 yr old sister on a porn site without admitting you were surfing said porn site?
That guy was drunk and couldn't get it up so he just tried to scissor me.
A total of 3 guys left my apartment this morning. That was my first clue to my black out endeavors last night. Gotta love wine Wednesdays.
When do you think the murder is going to happen in this Lifetime movie of ours?
Randomize
