the bus pole looks like a man who feels guiltyty about something
If Jimminey Cricket were here with me he would be so disappointed.
the line at the liquor store is out the door, and students in line are high-fiving like crazy...i love college snow days
Don't judge me. He's really sexy for a 17 year old. We made nasty in the womens bathroom at the beach. Don't worry. I wore sandals in there.
None of that is ok.
Its like fucking yourself in the head with a weed strapon
I found her sitting in the shower having an argument with the dolphins on the shower curtain.
all he has to do is look at me on new years and hes getting laid. thats how hot he is
Yeah.. he went to Tebow in the middle of the crosswalk and got hit by a cab... The yellow ones really don't stop
Hurry there's four guys dressed up as a bachelorette party, one has a condom veil and the rest are selling candy bouquets and asking if anyone wants to get laid for $5
that man is just a bundle of powerful magic and poor judgment
Just want to apologize again for asking to spot your form in the shower.
... and smoked a joint with my new landlord. I'm starting to like Germany.
Waking up early to fuck the hot DILF the day before Father's Day because I'm respectable like that
dude the last time we saw him was 2 nights ago when he was yelling that the trees were naked or some shit then he ran into the forest. I think its time for a search party
Like people our age are getting engaged, and I’m out here spooning with a giant unicorn I bought at Walmart on Black Friday.
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