R and i have drinken 4 bottles od red wine. By ourselfs
You were asking people if they could pee on you while you shotgunned beers
just watched a girl laugh at her own fingers... it's not even noon...
yeah. pants. i need to put pants on. i didn't do that last night. big mistake
so id say it was a successful trip...i only got hit on by one cousin...
there's a wings menu taped to my wall. don't tell me i don't have my priorities straight.
If this outfit doesn't get me pregnant tonight I don't know what will...
Ripped as fuck driving to get a portrait of my cat tattooed on my arm
Is girls night deemed a success when you piss the bed?
All of my exes are either overweight and neckbearded or dead. Someone out there is looking out for me.
Thinking of someone think of me while masturbating while I masturbate. & that's how the over thinkers do it ✌️
Imma go take shower so I can cleanly change into my drinking underwear.
Sexting just isn't as much fun once you learn how bad he is in bed...
Just met my future wife. Please dont fuck her.
I woke up and he already had a joint rolled waiting next to the bed. Love.
Randomize
