do you believe in love at first sight?
awwwwww =)
yea.. so can i have your sisters number? thanks!
i want tt clbm rinabw nd ride uncrn
what?
i wnt tto climb a rainboww and ride a unicornnnnnnnnn
p.s. you have a small clit
YOU ARE THE MOST AWKWARD PERSON ALIVE.
I want Jason Statham to talk British to my vagina.
well when i got there she was attempting to stick the cat in her mouth.. so maybe you should go check on her
Im doing kagels to the beat of Christmas music... "Jingle Bells" is hard. Try it.
Apparently the library doesn't care about celebrating the day Jesus became a zombie.
The best thing he's ever done for me was comment on my profile picture saying "hello boner"
How sober do you have to be to donate blood?
Fyi when u order four mini bottles of scotch on a 45 min flight. The flight attendants jaw drops to the floor.
she tends to only attract lesbians and homeless men
Someone had written "Boxmonsterette" on the bathroom wall and I just knew you'd been here.
hahahaha what do we need the kangaroos for? please tell me we release them instead of doves
I just saw a girl drinking wine and walking her dog in footie pajamas and a mad hatter hat. First day of the new year and I think I'm in love.
I feel like you should put up a missed connections ad for this..
Gotta say, self-deprecating Lord of the Rings-themed sex jokes were not on my agenda for today.
Randomize
