I hate cats. They're so curious, it's not their damn business.
I don't know how to say this, but I think you're a fucking bitch and the sooner you die I'll be happier.
Sorry- wrong number! :)
Hulk Hogan has now convinced 2 women to marry him & I have yet to have a successful or healthy relationship. I am officially depressed.
I just five second ruled a donut I dropped at starbucks, everyones staring
just woke up in a hotel room.. realizing its the hotel i work at.. lets see how this walk of shame turns out
Just saw a denim jacket with the phrase christian cowboy...ridin with the lord under a picture of a cowboy in a sunset. I'm def in mississippi.
is it sad that I can recall my outfits by who took them off?
Another Sunday, another 100 chicken nuggets
We need to tone down the drinking before our 7pm class. I don't remember receiving any of these handouts.
I just really need a hug and a shower beer
I was going through my mom's stuff to find her xanax, and I found her vibrators instead. Plural. That is like the opposite of what I wanted.
Drunk and alone at a magic show is what my life has become without you
The typical response to someone smacking their vodka soaked hand on your face is not to put your face in their crotch
That reminds me of the morning I woke up on the sidewalk covered in chicken wings
Woke up next to a slice if pizza. From what i can tell I tried to plug it into my phone charger. No more blackout wednesdays for this girl.
Randomize
