But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
did you know that the clit is basically just a tiny penis? Ya.. So just think about that next time you're down there.
better to have posed nude and lost than to never have posed nude at all...thats what i always say
Just wanted to remind you that you literally cut the underwear off a man.
Next year we will be 30 and no more shots during the week.
I don't want to have to force feed him my vagina!!
I don't care who it's from we're getting blown. It's a 3 day weekend anything can happen
you left saying you wanted to "go piss on that girl's doorstep" and we didn't see you the rest of the night
that actually explains a lot
I'm to sober to make life ruining decisions and alcohol is to expensive at this bar for me to fear that level of drunk happening
Apparently she broke up w/ her bf like 3 weeks ago. She actually called me to be her bday hookup cause she's single now. Patience- the virtue that occasionally pays off.
You know you're doing well in life when weed is considered to improve your job performance
I don't know what song to play at my bong's funeral!
Why the HOLY HELL is my dog on my roof??? Sam?? Why is the dog wearing my pants
At first it will make you think "how is this physically possible?" and then it will ruin an entire food group for you.
I keep finding granola in my bed. This is what I get for sleeping with a guy from Oregon.
Randomize
