She was walking with the authority that 2 beers gave to a light weight.
We made a drinking game out of poaching eggs. When did our life turn into a really awesome version of Top Chef?
we're doing shots for every degree below freezing it is outside
this guy is so high, he just ate half of a frozen blueberry muffin and half of a frozen poppyseed muffin, then proceeded to make a "hybrid poppyberry muffin"
I should have some sort of frequent buyer card or something. I just bought my third bottle of Captain this week. It's Wednesday.
When I realized it was a dog, and I still had a boner, it was awkward.
I ended up giving him head, i think it was mostly a defensive move so that he wouldn't discover i was wearing those onesy spanx
I literally need to be slapped with another cock just to notice it.
Seriously... Things should be way more awkward... The entire female half of the bridal party INCLUDING THE BRIDE blew me in high school....
The guy I woke up with is wearing the same nailpolish as me...I need to stop drinking
As its breast cancer awareness month, I'm going to do my part by making everyone aware of my breasts
I'm glad the semester is over. I need a break from the term "whiskey sharts" coming up so much in conversation.
your were asleep with people making out on top of you. you didn't even look bothered by it.
You spent the whole night conversing with your zombie poster, so I'd say you were pretty far gone.
Chasing shots with airborne.. Gonna get rid of my sickness and my soberness.
Randomize
