So you're telling me it's impossible to have a "slight case" of chlamydia?
just tell him i said nine months
I think we should start referring to bisexuals as "strays"
She calls her new ritual "bed, bath, and beyond crunk". Hence why I found her passed out in my bath tub this morning.
amateur piercings on our way to the beach? check.
That glade motion activator thing keeps going off every time we pass the bong. I don't know what I'm getting high off right now.
i was so fucked up i thought i was at home depot
So on a scale from 1-10 how gross is it that I used mortuary makeup on my own face?
I want to get "Patrick Kane" wasted tonight
I am one hundred percent down for that
The more I piece together last night the more I want to vomit it out of my brain.
I have not brushed my hair. I'm wearing a yoga hoodie. I look like I slept in a gutter somewhere. Today is going to be a good day.
I accidentally sent a snap of my puss with the Republican filter... Totally killed his boner
You had all day to plan ahead & get mixers, so whose fault is this sobriety?
I left the party 20 min ago..just thought i would tell you so you wouldnt think i fell in the lake again
I JUST NEEDED TO TELL YOU I JUST FUCKED TWO BOYS IN THE SPAN OF LIKE THREE HOURS AND ONE OF THEM WAS MY SISTERS PROM DATE FROM HIGH SCHOOL IM LOWKEY BOTH PROUD AND ASHAMED
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