That's what you get when you play shuffleboard drunk.
I'm home alone watching The Hills seasons, eating pickles and drinking straight rye. I just googled "how to make friends". Probably not the most pro-active solution. Help.
Blew in her face. She is Pissed. Yahtzee. As she brushes her teeth.
you were so drunk you slurred your pauses
woke up to 35 texts all saying im cheating on her
me and last nights hook up spent two hr. figuring out a reply we went with i love you..
We just found a handle of vodka in our fridge and no one knows how it got there. God I love spring break.
scarred for life. way too high and witnessed some chick give a dude head on the dance floor
You can't say "they have anal bleaching for that" and then just hang up
Pitchers of shots should be outlawed. I've puked more than i've breathed in the past half hour.
whoever brushed my teeth and whitened them while i was passed out, thanks.
He has a shower chair now. So he sits and watches me shower. It's kind of creepy.
Because you work where i will be drunk tonight I'm asking you. Is a shirt required on Halloween?
He spelled Steven with "ph", needless to say my nose was almost bleeding from the amount of axe he was wearing.
I told him the only reason I'd sleep with him is if we have a threesome because I'll need moral support
Of course his biggest mistake was assuming that I ever gave a fuck to begin with.
Randomize