i feel so shallow. people in iran are using twitter to write hardcore nathan hale shit about dying for freedom. my last tweet was "i hate the taco shits"
i cant remember past the part when we filled his tub with skittles.
our health teacher's ringtone is Bad Romance and she has a tramp stamp. i will not skip this class, ever.
i remember introducing him to all my posters and making him be extra nice to frank sinatra and bob dylan before he fucked me
Yeah you insisted everyone watch Space Jam at 2 in the morning then you cried the whole way through it. You were the very worst kind of drunk.
you really cant fit homeless dj into your budget? doubles as charity
No like you fell onto the fence. I don't even know how you got into the fenced in area.
Youre the drunk baby that everyone wants to take care of.
Topenga is going to be back on TV. Finally my fantasy of her being a milf in junior high has come full circle.
we left when one of the guys tried to stick himself with an IV that he found
I need to find another hobby that doesn't include being hungover.
I told him finishing at the same time would be a long-term project. Like flipping a house. A sexual house.
I need to start a penis folder so I stop "accidentally" showing people my junk. On a side note- St. Pattys penis was a hit, four leaf clover and all.
Sorry, i'm on a strict diet of vodka and regret
you made the house rule that every time you'd say "yay" everyone had to drink.
that explains so much
Randomize
