Fuck their fairy tale bullshit. I shall ruin it. With a few thrusts of my cock.
sent the pic of my tit to the wrong bbm chatroom
Well I turned her sobriety into my own personal drinking game
Do you knowwwwww you never ha to pee while lhr on eztacy
We just ended up getting drunk and doing field sobriety tests on each for practice... No one remembers who passed.
Do you think I should still be the condom fairy for Halloween even though I'll be like.. Almost 8 months pregnant?
This is what we get for YOLOing our way to obesity
My sister was borrowing my phone when the sext came through. She just said "wow. He's got a nice dick!" Then went on like nothing happened. Outed by a dick pic and its no big deal. Best sister ever.
I disagree, if your last name is Weiner then the sending of dick pics should be mandatory. I'd give him a pass.
No I need this job. I actually contemplated buying a vibrator with my dad's credit card the other night.
WOKE UP NEXT TO A PLATE OF MEATBALLS HAPPY MONDAY
WTF DOES CAROLINE HAVE GLASS IN HER FACE
I know you would. And one day, we'll have a moment where i'll verbally assault a stranger for you.
Is that your Nuva ring on the floor? Shit must have gotten crazy
Double high-fived his wife and her sister on the way out. If I'm not the best mistress ever tell me how.
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