I just saw Ann slam dunk her puke bag into a trash can on Avenue A. You ladies might want to consider putting the Patron shots down and going home.
Im making the walk of shame with half a box of pizza, its like when youre little and you get a goodie bag leaving the party
Downstairs neighbor just asked me to tell people when they jump off the balcony next time not to land on her flowers
I might scale it back and go as an investment banker. Which is the exact same costume as James Bond on LSD. I just introduce myself differently.
Remember when we made you finish your beer after you puked into your glass?
i hate being the asshole.
He got completely naked and is now just standee there next to my bed poking at my hamster. Why can't I get sex the normal way.
How can I not totally like a guy that told me my boobs were too big for me to be taught how to play golf?
We dropped so many bottles they would only give us plastic cups. We actually drank ourselves back to preschool.
her wearing orange crocs at the bar was definitely a great form of contraception
But the Super Mario beer pong table is more than appropriate.
This is exactly why you shouldn't bang your bartender. Although the awkward free shots are a plus.
We are horrible
Yeah but we're also awesome
That jawline could fucking have its way with me.
We just finished having sex and as soon as we get out of bed he yells "trust fall" and runs me over
I miss all the tiny banana hammocks... When can I go back to ogling? I can do it from a lot farther than six feet without any complaints.
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