i hate that site..its like every vagina you dont wanna see
seagrams + popov + pineapple + milk. there, ur search for worlds worst drink is over. you're welcome
the 24 hour champagne diet aint going so well
the girl i fucked last night woke up this morning, disoriented and looked at me, and said "oh, you're hot." and went back to sleep.
you sat up and said "i'm the worst kind of roommate, the drunk kind"
My dick was out way too much saturday not to get laid
Tequila bombs in champagne seemed like a good idea at the time.
I ate a pepperoni off of someone's floor last night. We need to talk.
You screamed "There's a potato in my anus" and proceeded to attempt to grind with the bouncer. Also, I'm pretty sure our Chem teacher was in the same bar as us.
For sure. Gotta go. Building an igloo.
BURNT NIPPLES ARE UNHAPPY NIPPLES.
I feel like these arent even my fingers anymore
I have alcoholic tendencies but you know what? College
I'm literally taking a shit naked holding a bottle of wine.
The teenager outdrank all of us. All. Of. Us. I woke up and she was getting everyone water and fruit snacks. I give up.
Randomize
