i think i may have caused an international incident at the french embassy, just fyi
hahaha how?
its a long story involving a horse trailer and some shrubbery
The album was titled "Best Night Ever" until she found out she was preggers and switched it to "God Punishes Sluts"
I'm pretty sure we've had sex a bunch more times than we've hugged. So hugs are weird when they happen.
idk if its the weather or the "im still drunk" or the morning sex i just had with my roommates gf but that was def the most enjoyable walk in the rain ever
She said i saw her in the study room, waved, disappeared, came back with a coke from god knows where, and slurred "i have a drinking problem but i ate grits"
Definitely Got caught hugging a strangers tree last night with 5 others.
Talked to Nate, told him he was a douche. Will give details when sober. It's ok. You're my best friend together a wolf pack. Olive juice.
That's awesome and prob the first time you had an idea of what to do. I'm super proud of you Chelz
Its cos im stoned ! My high self is maturing
I want to be the sort of person he can respect in the morning once the drugs wear off.
i think the last part kind of negates the first part there
On my way home from the dentist. Was going to call and see if you would like to wake and bake, then remembered my sister is an adult
I may be asexual, but I owe you a solid from yesterday. I am a man of my word.
I dunno that I'd be trusting enough of junkyard tequila to drink it.
I dont even remember what i was saying but just one minute i was crying and the next i was showing u my genitals
Sent. All. My. Texts. Like. This. Last. Night. Thank. You. Weed. Also. Had. A. Dream. About. A. Serial. Killer. That. Killed. Everyone. Except. Me. And.
Best single mom victory - getting eaten out in my dodge caravan in the hospital parkade at midnight.Three words: screaming multiple orgasms.
Randomize
