Sooo i definitely have a major burn on my chin from kenny's ...stubble from making out for hours while coked up. Pure class.
Circus confirmed... Jello shots before 9 pm are not cocktails for sucess
As long as they suck a good dick I don't care what fruit they have and where they have it
Nothing says Christmas like gin and tears.
THEY'RE. IN. YOUR. BED. THEY RANDOMLY SHOW UP. AND GET IN YOUR BED.
Thanks in advance for a great weekend. Sorry your roommates are going to hate you after I leave. They need to loosen up anyways.
Somehow me showing up to/breaking into her house only to find I was a week early for the party became a night of weed cookies and sex.
$100 bras are my way of telling my boobs that I love and appreciate them, and all the metaphorical doors they have opened for me.
whose parrot is this?
my mom tried to talk to me about my drinking, i somehow turned it around on her, now shes going to AA and I'm going to the bar.
I really need to stop sending pussy pics if I'm going to be running for state representative in November
She yelled out "MCDREAMY" mid orgasm
If you're signed up as "sober sister" can you do cocaine or nah
MDMA, margaritas, mashed potatoes and ice cream aren't keto Kristin
Omg, new summer goal: sex in a bouncy castle.
Randomize
