Wooohooo! I'm sitting in the car like a creep watching people walk in and out of Blush. Lots of happy people.
what's Bukake?
a bad idea.
i'm so high i feel like the people i'm chatting with online can some how see that i'm naked.
The liquor store is having an inventory reduction sale. It would be a sin not to stop and help them out.
And we all know God doesn't like sinners.
Amen.
dont touch anything in my room. If its phallus shaped, i can almost guarantee its been in my vagina.
I literally need to be slapped with another cock just to notice it.
Also, I am ligit concerned that I might compulsively start collecting vibrators like Pokemon.
No im the worst roommate ever. Just dump a bucket of water on my head at 8am so i can suffer like i deserve to.
And you were like "stop making pop tarts, lil bowow" as you grabbed the pop tarts from your ex and consumed them. Teach me your ways.
Remind me not to get naked underneath a tree I'm allergic to again.
THIS IS NO TIME FOR SHAME JOSH. JUST GOTTA GET IT IN. PURELY FOR LEVELING UP PURPOSES
You can not love someone based on who they were when they were 9. Does he know how many dicks I've sucked since then?
Medicine hack, old crowe and ramen flavor packets isnt a cure for the cold.
Remember that guy that walked around our house naked with a boner wearing nothing but his winter coat? Well, he has a kid now.
last night I mixed vodka in with my protein shake... and you tell me my new years resolution was impossible
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