I'm being pulled over???
For what!?!?!
??? I'm in a cab!!!!!
My bra smells like weed because there's weed in my bra
i woke up to find out i shared my bed with a full, open can of natty light last night and didnt spill it. then i drank it for breakfast.
See, thats where im at with my life, welcome to the slut yaht we will be cruising comfortably all summer at an extremely drunken relaxing pace S.S. Slut Bucket
Way too stoned bro. Was laying down on my back and thought for a good 30 mins what it would be like to be a turtle stuck on its shell
I sent him a tit pic with the caption, "Mt. Arie and Mt. Hola are ready for expedition." Too nerdy?
So baked. About to eat a calzone then hate fuck this guy.
THAT'S MY GIRL
my suitemate came in my room last night and flashed me. and then she just walked away. deff transferred to the right school
For an hr, you were convinced you no longer had a right arm so you played Super Mario Bros with just your left hand vs Beth. You won btw, mite b why she refused to wear the unicorn head
You know you're high when, "Why can't I steal the duck?!" Becomes a serious question.
Stop calling my penis "Fat Jesus"
I was having a serious heart-to-heart, and then the weed gummy kicked in.
I'm actually glad the whole thing's over now. It's exhausting to fake a pregnancy.
Imagine not having to fake it.
Yeah, I should never have kids, probably.
If you don't sing 'dust in the wind' at my funeral, I'll haunt you forever
I don't remember anything from last night, but at track I found my thong next to the high jump pit... So it must has been decent
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