he made me salute his american flag boxers before i took them off
I dont know if he should be happy or mad about it but he's too big for a blow job.
I just want a box on franzia all to myself. Just me, my wine, my tears, & my self loathing.
They live so far away from me that not fucking them both would have been financially irresponsible
we marched down beaver avenue with lit tiki torches humming the olympics opening song.
He was like an artic tracker. Walked ten paces from the tree, then 15 paces from the mailbox, dug down in the snow, and pulled up the case of beer he hid from his parents out there. It tasted like ice cold success.
You made a glowstick headband with a helium balloon tied around it and climbed a tree in high heels. I was impressed.
Wait does semen show up on blood tests?
I got back from work this morning after working the night shift to find an NFL player scaling the side of our apartment...from your window. He just took sneaking out to all new level. Care to explain?
I think that about sums it up, actually.
I dressed up as a "typical white girl" which meant I wore my yoga pants and uggs all night. BEST. IDEA. EVER. Most comfy halloween everrrr.
It's simple. He fucks me at his place and I fuck him at my place. It's like man of the house gets to top.
Doing a small happy dance cause my cocaine successfully went through airport security
We broke my graduation cords last night when we used them to tie each other up during sex last night
Tinder in Coventry is like browsing a gallery of mugshots from Azkaban
YOU SLEPT WITH A GUY WHO HAS A BILLBOARD IN HIS HONOR?
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